Dating with an Disability

How to Date When You Have a Disability

As with many changes and challenges in life, such as an onset of illness, other parts of our life change, and that includes our romantic relationships, whether married, dating or single. For people in a loving relationship, often the relationship will fair strong as the support systems are often in place. For others who are in an already rocky situation extra work will be required, such as counselling for the marriage or dealing with the changes of tha arthritis. The counselling for arthritis and the marriage will either make or break the relationship that was volatile any way; The relationship may have crumbled with or without the arthritis illness coming into the relationship, so no matter what you are not to blame of to feel guilt for having arthritis, the ship was sinking anyway.

For those that are single and want to enter a relationship, remember you are wonderful person with much to offer and you need to realize you are not your illness, arthritis is something you have and not who you are. Arthritis can come and go and when the “right arthritis medication”  is found which works for you, there will be many good days and you may be able to return to work and continue activities that you enjoyed before. And being in a relationship maybe one.  A wonderful relaionship will lift your spirits and you will feel value for your self.

So how do you find the online date search that matches your needs. The key is to be as specific as possible, if you are a senior looking to date, then seek a senior onlibe date site, the same goes for a single parent date search, a Christian date match or any other specific relatiohship match.

So don’t give up the date scene, there are many wonderful people to meet, who are compassioanete and loving people, who want to get into a relationship with or without you having arthritis or not. The same as dating if you have lupus, chronic fatigue or any other illness that you cope with.

So hit the Internet and find your love match oneline now.

Researchers from Mount Sinai School of Medicine have found a new mechanism that explains how certain immune cells are activated to create protective antibodies against infections or pathological antibodies such as those present in autoimmune diseases like lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. The research is published online in the September issue of Nature Immunology. Led by Dr. Andrea Cerutti, MD, Professor of Medicine at Mount Sinai School of Medicine, researchers studied human tissue and immune cells from people with mutations of TACI and MyD88, two proteins required to activate the immune system. MyD88 is a signaling protein that alerts the so-called innate immune system—the immune system encoded at birth that remains unchanged—to the presence of pathogens. TACI is a receptor protein used to activate immune cells in the so-called adaptive immune system, a more sophisticated immune system than the innate, which is dynamic and combats pathogens. These new studies provided important and unexpected new insights in our understanding of immune diseases such as immunodeficiencies and autoimmune disorders.

“Our research shows that TACI and MyD88 are part of an immune circuit that bridges the innate and adaptive immune systems. This circuit makes our immune response more flexible, allowing a more effective generation of protective antibodies during infections. Genetic defects of TACI and MyD88 cause immunodeficiencies characterized by recurrent, life-threatening infections. On the other hand, an abnormally strong TACI-MyD88 interaction may exacerbate autoimmune diseases like lupus or rheumatoid arthritis,” said Dr. Cerutti, lead investigator of the study. “Previous studies had suggested an involvement of TACI and MyD88 in lupus. Now that we have identified this interaction, we can figure out a way to inhibit it and prevent these diseases from getting worse.”Autoimmune diseases like lupus and rheumatoid arthritis are characterized by exaggerated production of molecules that activate the adaptive immune system and abnormal antibodies, which attack normal cells causing inflammation and tissue damage. This exaggerated production may occur partly as a result of abnormally strong signaling from TACI via MyD88. By analyzing cells and tissues from immunodeficient patients and genetically engineered mice, Dr. Cerutti’s team found a previously unknown interaction between TACI and MyD88 that is important for the production of antibodies against infectious agents. Yet, the same interaction may cause the exaggerated immune response in people with autoimmune diseases.

“Our discovery provides a novel specific target, the signaling pathway between TACI and MyD88, to block the overreaction of the immune system and tissue damage in individuals with autoimmune disorders,” said Dr. Cerutti. “We look forward to studying this discovery further and developing therapeutic targets that will inhibit the interaction between TACI and MyD88, preventing autoimmune diseases from progressing with fewer side effects than currently prescribed treatments.”

Dr. Cerutti’s team collaborated with other researchers at Mount Sinai School of Medicine, including Charlotte Cunningham-Rundles, MD, Professor of Medicine and Pediatrics, and Huabao Xiong, PhD, Assistant Professor of Medicine.

According to the National Women’s Health Information Center, autoimmune diseases impact 23.5 million Americans. Common examples include lupus, in which the immune system attacks the skin and/or several organs within the body; rheumatoid arthritis, in which the immune system attacks joints; multiple sclerosis, in which the immune system attacks the nervous system; and Type 1diabetes, in which the immune system attacks insulin-producing cells in the pancreas.

Source: The Mount Sinai Hospital / Mount Sinai School of Medicine

 The back is more complicated than you think. We take it for granted. We lay down on it, bend it, and use it for leverage. Then when it stops working, we find out real quick how much trouble we are in without a healthy back. Maybe it has something to do with what the back is supposed to do, and more importantly, what the back is not supposed to do.

Sleep is essential to back support, a good bed and pillow will help

Structure of the back

Let’s start with the basics. If you remove the skin, the muscle, the fat, and the ligaments, you can see just where we begin with the back. We’ll omit the technical terms and use layman’s terms that we all can understand to begin discovering what forms the back.

Your back is made up of vertebrae, small rounded bones that stack on top of one another. These bones, also referred to as the spinal column collectively, have openings in the middle. That opening is to accommodate your spinal cord. The spinal cord is the long tube that runs from the base of your brain all the way to your tail-bone. All of your nerves arise from the spinal cord and branch out to various places within the body.There are 5 sections to your spinal column:

• Cervical – 7 movable vertebrae in the neck area
• Thoracic – 12 movable vertebrae in the chest area
• Lumbar – 5 movable vertebrae in the lower back area
• Sacral – 5 fused vertebrae at the level of your pelvis which connect with your pelvis
• Coccyx – 4 fused vertebrae that make up your tail-bone

Your spine has a natural curve to it which allows you to move fluidly instead of stiff. Another reason we have ease of movement is the spongy discs that reside in between each vertebra. These discs have a soft middle that protects the spinal cord and a tougher outer layer that supports the weight of the vertebra above and below it.

There are spaces between the vertebrae, created by their unique shape, that allow nerves to pass through. These nerves travel to organs, muscle, ligaments, tendons, skin and the like. At lightning speed, impulses are passed from organs to nerves to the brain, and back to nerves and back to the organ. That is why there is no delay from the time you put your finger on a hot stove to the time that you scream and pull your hand away.

That’s the structure of the back, simply illustrated.  However, when you’re experiencing back pain, you wouldn’t think so.  There is a complexity to the machinations of the back that cause many of us to suffer from aches and pains that seem like a mystery.  When you understand that the back is your support system for your entire body, you can better understand the importance of good back care.

Vitamins are Essential in the Fight Against Arthritis and Depression

Where do you find antioxidants?  They are all around us, you are probably eating them without even knowing and they are essential to our good health.  Check out your  local farmer’s market and buy organic wherever you can, or your produce aisle in the grocery store, many of them sell organic as well as regular but check out the price differences  to see if organic fits the budget. 

Fruits and vegetables contain the principle sources of antioxidants.

Examples of antioxidants include:

* Vitamin C     * Vitamin A    * Vitamin E    * Lutein    * Lycopene    * Beta-carotene 

Certain minerals like zinc and selenium are also needed for body function.  They are not antioxidants but they boost the immune system to fight against free radical damage.Antioxidants are also found in nuts, legumes, cold water fish, seafood and red meat.  So, eating a varied diet of fruits, vegetables and the foods just named will increase the amount of antioxidants in your system and help reduce the incidence of disease.  Eating fruits and vegetables in their natural form is far better than drinking juice, you will be more satisfied as the actual fruit and vegetables will take time to digest. Fruit juice however good for you in it’s natural form still brings the benefit of  nutrients found in the foods, but tends to enter the blood stream sooner and can cause a sugar surge which gives the body a quick but short boost of energy, so try and eat in whole form first. Food does more than stave off hunger, natural rich food found here can help us to live longer and help us stay free of disease as we age, and even if we are already dealing with arthritis or any other illness.

 While we are on the subject of nutrition, not only os it essential for our body nut even more so for our mental health when we are fighting an illness, it is easy for us to become depressed and suffer with anxiety, after all many of us have been  dealt a card we never expected to to cope with, and it changes everything as we know it.  Pain also causes us to become irritable, no one can keep chipper when they are in constant pain, getting little sleep and don’t know whether to sit or stand.

 Good nutrition will helps us emotionally, no we won’t feel great all of the time, but what we put into our bodies will help the chemicals react differently and help us keep our mood levels balanced. And heaven knows we need everything we can to help us. So take a trip to the market, stock up on quality foods especially of they are is sale and freeze what you can. If it is a fruit such as strawberries that do not freeze well then buy small to avoid waste, I know I tend to get carried away when I see the beautiful fresh fruit and vegetables, buy too much and it spoils before I can eat it all, so that is a tip to be aware of.

If you choose to take vitamins make sure you check with your physician first as not all foods and vitamins work with medication prescribed by your Dr.

Increasing numbers of arthritis and depression

Here are some facts on arthritis, the numbers and shocking and probably a low estimate due to undiagnosed patients and the numerous types of arthritis that make it difficult to determine what is or is not arthritis.

Arthritis Facts

Arthritis is an inflammatory condition of the joints that can at times disable the patient. The consequences of arthritis include joint disfigurement and constrained joint mobility. Arthritis affects adults and children of all ages and does not discriminate between race or gender.

These are just the Statistics of Americans with arthritis or chronic joint symptoms, the numbers are believed to be much higher with people in the UK.• 1985 – 35 million

• 1990 – 37.9 million

• 1998 – nearly 43 million (1 in 6 people)

• 2006 – 46 million (nearly 1 in 5 adults)

The numbers could be increasing due to the aging population, however, we must look at our diet and the chemicals we are being forced to ingest in our foods quite innocently.

• Arthritis is said to be one of the most ubiquitous chronic health problems and is leading cause of disability among Americans over age 15.

• Arthritis is second only to heart disease as grounds of work disability.

• Arthritis limits daily activities such as walking, dressing and bathing for more than 7 million Americans.

• Arthritis results in 39 million doctor visits and more than a half million hospitalizations.

• Arthritis influences people in all age groups together with nearly 300,000 children and that can include babies too.

• Baby boomers are now at chief jeopardy. More than half those affected are under age 65.

• Arthritis is a term used to refer to more than hundred different diseases that concern areas in or around joints.

General Information:

• Women – 24.3 million of the people with arthritis diagnosed by a doctor

• Men – 17.1 million of the people with arthritis diagnosed by a doctor

The disease also has an affect on other parts of the body. Arthritis causes pain, loss of movement and sometimes swelling. Some types of arthritis are:

• Osteoarthritis: a degenerative joint disease in which the cartilage that covers the ends of bones in the joint deteriorates, causing pain and loss of movement as bone begins to rub against bone. It is the most prevalent form of arthritis.

• Rheumatoid arthritis: an autoimmune disease in which the joint lining becomes inflamed as part of the body’s immune system activity. Rheumatoid arthritis is one of the most serious and disabling types, affecting mostly women.

• Gout is a form which mostly affects men. It is usually the result of a defect in body chemistry. This painful condition most often attacks small joints, especially the big toe. Fortunately, gout almost always can be completely controlled with medication and changes in diet.

• Ankylosing spondylitis is a type that affects the spine. As a result of inflammation, the bones of the spine grow together.

• Juvenile arthritis is a common term for all types of arthritis that come about in children. Children may develop juvenile rheumatoid arthritis or childhood forms of lupus, Ankylosing spondylitis or other types of arthritis.

• Systemic lupus erythematosus (lupus): a severe disorder that can agitate and damage joints and other connective tissues all over the body.

These are just a few of the main types of arthritis, and we have not even hit the side effects that come with painful arthritis. There is a heavy emotional toll that comes with arthritis, depression, insomnia and the emotional impact of a changed life. There are financial difficulties, relationship and family adjustments not to mention the career changes, that is if a change is even an option. It isn’t as if the arthritis will necessarily allow you to change jobs, and what make it worse it is an unseen disease and many people are left bewildered as to why you have days that appear as if you are well and the next day, cannot perform the simplest of tasks.

Arthritis of all forms are in the beginning stages of major medical break throughs, but there is a long way to go and we are trusting in virtually unknown medications at this time.

In the meantime I would like to suggest that everyone look after their health and support their body as best they can with nutritional support, the best diet they can eat and to get rest whenever possible and to partake in activities to the best they can. Our body is a whole, there are no seperate parts of the body,even though it feels that way, but if we can support the whole we can help support the areas that are not working so well and offer a fighting chance.

 Read and follow what you believe will help you and take care of yourself the very best you can,

Andrea

Author of  www.arthritisandbeyond.com and www.about-real-life.com

How to Take Care of Yourself While Caring for Someone with Arthritis

We are the sandwich generation; most of us will at sometime be caring for an elderly family member or someone with an illness such as arthritis and at the same time caring for our children and ourselves all at the same time. The stress level we would carry could be enormous and very unhealthy for our own well being.

Providing care for a loved one with arthritis can be extremely stressful and exhausting, not only are we the caregiver but very frustrating and upsetting as we cannot fix the illness and watch them suffer very often. When anyone depends on us there is an added layer of pressure and commitment and often can all be just too overwhelming. So in light of this we must find a way to take care of our needs, so here are a few tips to follow:

• Take a quiet time just for you to read a good book you enjoy, soak in a bubble bath or visit with a friend or your pop out for coffee with your spouse. This is you time to do whatever you want.
• Ask for support and find someone to give you a longer break whether it’s another family member to share with assistance, or hire a caregiver for a few hours while you shop, go to a salon, take a yoga class or whatever you like as long as it is a change in routine for you. Aim for a break at least once a week whenever possible, you deserve and need this time.
• Find a friend to talk to or your pastor or even better, join a support group, whether in person or an online group where others understand what you are going through. This will help take away the feeling of isolation and give answers to your questions and a place where you can offer meaningful support to others in the same boat,  this will also give you a sense of community and contribution. The other great thing about an online group, no matter what the time of day or night you usually have access to chat with someone on line.
• Though often easier said than done, it is essential to get your important sleep, so if you can’t get a full night sleep in take a cat nap when your loved one is sleeping.
• Eat well, snack on nutritious food throughout the day to keep up your energy levels and to keep your brain chemicals emotionally balanced.
• And remember you cannot care for anyone if you are not well yourself, so take care of yourself first.

How to Take Care of Yourself as a Caregiver

Debt Help and Illness

Often when we have to take time off work or had to quit or job we find ourselves in financial situations we never thought we would be in. Trying to adjust our lifestyle and budget can time and as a result it is possible to end up in financial difficulty; we cannot pay bills on time, fall behind and the nest thing is we have creditors calling daily making demands that we are unable to fulfill. This then adds to the incredible stress of daily life we are trying to cope with.

Do here are a few tips to hold creditors at bay while we work towards getting our financial life in order.

• Demand all pertinent information about your debt from creditors you to be sent to you in writing, including all of the details; name of the creditor, the full amount of principal, interest and penalties.
• If you feel that any debt is not yours or sounds erroneous dispute it immediately, in writing send a copy to the creditor and collection agency and always keep a copy for yourself. Always send letters by registered mail to ensure receipt. The goal is for you is to prove the agency has a legitimate claim as there are so many scams out there and even legitimate agencies do make mistakes.
• Hang up on harassing collectors if they call you after 9 p.m. or before 8 a.m. If that doesn’t stop them, you can threaten legal action–and do follow up with action, especially if they make threats against you or use abusive language. You do not have to take this and this behaviour is never acceptable.
• If you legitimately owe money, work out a manageable payment plan with the collector to eliminate it. Make sure that you can keep the payment schedule that you agree to, so that no further contact is necessary. If you default on this plan, the creditor may have the right to sue you or garnish your wages.
• If you are being unfairly harassed contact the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) or your local ombudsman or councillor and ask for advocacy. You may also be able to get an advocate from the Arthritis Society to assist with such calls or letters.. The Attorney General’s office in your state can also help. They have the authority to take action against unscrupulous creditors and shut them down.
• Creditors aren’t the only ones who can sue, you have the right to take harassing creditors to court, and sue for up to $1,000 of statutory damages, plus your actual damages and legal costs. It may be possible to take your case to a lawyer on a contingency basis or to get assistance with legal aid due to your health and financial circumstances.
• Our next plan os to hand off our credit to a credit bureau for assitance or to consolidate our finances to make more managable. We will cover this in the next article.

Depression affects over 19 million Americans, and that is just in the USA, so can you imagine the picture across the world, especially the UK, where the numbers are extremely high and Canada. Yet depression is still misunderstood as well as mis- diagnosed. For those who suffer from depression, the symptoms are difficult to explain as they do not know what they are thinking and feeling from one minute to the next, and then there is the embarrassment to tell someone there is something wrong with me but I can’t explain it.

Many stigmas go with depression, so when people with depression are interviewed some of the answers were sad and disturbing and frustrating that we have not accepted this into our society and that people are not comfortable in seeking the treatment requiredMany people think that people who suffer with depression are crazy people, disorganized, moody, temperamental and hard to be around, and those are people with mild cases of depression. Then we have the other people who look just plain crazy, they wander the streets talking to them and look through garbage and take drugs and even worse. The sad truth is there are so many people who were living perfectly normal lives, then one day something happened in their lives, they had either been living with mild depression which left undiagnosed and untreated and further increased until they could not function in normal life.

Even worse, if there is a worse, many of these people have suffered a trauma and or abuse growing up or had a loss or some other traumatic experience such as a loss of a child, spouse, job, that has thrown them into complete turmoil, they end up undiagnosed, non functioning, have no support system, financially can end up broke and eventually on the streets, with no way out and wandering in a stupor;;and you know what, it can happen to anyone, even you or someone you love. How do you think people end up committing suicide? They are not having a bad day or two, they are living in a hell, agony, living in their own world, deep and in pain, they don’t and can’t come out and say hey guys, I am feeling pretty crappy, I have had enough and think I am going to kill myself. No, they, don’t call around for help, they are secretly begging that someone will notice and pick them up and take them somewhere and get them help, because they cannot do it themselves. If they were able to do that they would be considered by most as being quite normal and having a bad time.

Here are a few thoughts form people who found out they suffered with depression and their beliefs around their pain.

 When I found out I had depression I cried, I was relieved to have an answer for how I was feeling but thought I would be like the crazy people and would end up rummaging through garbage and people would avoid me and keep their kids away. Depression is a hidden disease and no one knows what is going on behind the scenes.. The strange thing is, I am a very strong person and function really well, but all of a sudden I am reduced to tears and cannot handle anything. Commercials will set me off, I could feel emotions that I never thought, I would feel at the lowest place in the world and no one would expect his form me. Even when I went to the Dr’s I always looked dos together and it was so embarrassing to say I don’t feel right, especially as I looked so normal. I cannot believe that when it grabbed me I could not pick myself up for all the positive thinking and good things I would do for myself when I was functioning well. Mandy P.

I had a friend tell me last year that she suffered with depression, she hid it well, and I realised that as I listened that I had similar symptoms that this is what I was going through, so I went and got help, I was so glad she had shared that with me, we talk about it often as you cannot explain it to anyone else unless you have been through it. I don’t feel anyone gets this until they have faced it. –Ceri.

The most surprising thing that I’ve learned about dealing with depression is how it can take over your whole life. I had suffered with depression at different times and I went to the Dr’s and was told it is common with women and their hormones, and was prescribed a mild depression medication. It made no difference so I went back, got the same result, another medication and nothing changed. I felt so frustrated that I left it. Later in life I lost a child, the grief was unbelievable and then the depression was so sever along with the grief, it took years to diagnose as the Dr’s kept focusing on the grief and not getting the depression symptoms as well. Eventually after going Dr to Dr I was diagnosed with severe depression, to manic depression and now have its own label as Bi –Polar (BP). The medication and treatment is a lot but without it I am not sure I would be here today, I have also looked into the natural medications, but when I am in such severe emotional pain I need help now. I still have days where I want to be on another planet, really anywhere but here. Ife can be agonizing, especially when you are dealing with severe depression and grief. I just want my son back. So a double whammy, no one understands me, life can be so cruel. I have gone form a person who had a great job, marriage, fabulous family life, to someone who lives a lonely life, still married, cannot work, but without hope and a thoughts of a future. I left the place I lived as it was so painful, lost friends because I was so down and depressed and trying to get by day by day. I see the street people and understand how many of them got there. Louise R.

Once antidepressants worked for me, I felt normal for the first time in a long time. I’ve spent my whole teenage years and adulthood depressed and I felt like I had times where I did not want to kill myself and even felt there was some future… I was so amazed to It was so good to feel what normal was like until the medication stopped working and I had too many side effects to continue with them, I was devastated and now trying to find a medication that works. Davis F.

Truths about Depression

I was surprised by how much depression has to do with anger and often anger turned in. For me the frustration and pain that I see is insurmountable. It’s like I absorb the pain of the world and there’s not much that cannot trigger sadness or anger as I see in justice and then the depression seems to get worse because there is so little I can do about it. I used to feel more hope, now I feel like a poor test animal (which I hate animals being mistreated and hurt) to find a medication that will work, I want the pain to go and for people to believe that this is real. I don’t wish this on anyone, but maybe just for a few minutes in my darkest hours to see what it really feels like because you can’t explain it. Janice K

What surprised me most was how many people think it’s something we can just turn off and on at will. People still tell me that if I just think the right thoughts I’ll be fine, if only it was that simple, I would do anything for happy, joy and normal, I feel that is just for the movies. I don’t see many people running around in this state as joy. Some people even think I’m feeling like this on purpose and it brings loneliness to my world and I shut down and don’t feel I can talk to anyone and trust them. Very few realize it’s a chronic health issue, just like any other serious illness and yes usually for life. Depression is no different, you can’t wish it away. It may have been caused by a brain injury, trauma, chemical imbalance, I for one wish we had the answer –mark-m

Positive thinking does not work. It is so amazingly true that people just don’t get it until they go through it. Sometimes, I honestly wish the people around me who have no clue could get a little taste of it. It really is a disease. Part of it may be the way you think or your personality, but I definitely feel that it’s often beyond your control, no matter how positive you try to be. –babs-12

Truth about depression-from people who suffer with it